How to Write a Good Rejection Letter

Author: Sarah Green Carmichael

Rejection letters aren’t easy for any of us to write. Whether you’re telling a job candidate that they didn’t make the next round, an entrepreneur that you’re not going to fund their project, or a vendor that you no longer need their services, these are emails most of us dread crafting. Because it’s unpleasant, too many of us put it off or don’t do it at all, essentially letting our silence do the talking. That’s a missed opportunity (and rude). Though painful, rejection has benefits: Research by Linus ­Dahlander at ESMT and Henning Piezunka at INSEAD has found, for example, that when organizations take the time to explicitly reject (rather than just passively ignore) crowdsourced ideas, it both increases the quality of the ideas they’re being offered and increases the engagement of the crowd.

If there’s one thing that I’ve learned in a decade at Harvard Business Review—during which I’ve rejected literally thousands of ideas, pitches, and drafts—it’s that a quick “no” is better than a long “maybe.”

Writing a Basic Rejection Letter

Writing good rejections does take a bit of time—­especially at first. But one of the benefits of learning to write a good rejection letter is that it forces you to think clearly about what it is that you want from other people, and what it is that your organization really needs.

Rejection letters need not be long, and the reason you give for the rejection need not be super-detailed. If you don’t have much of a relationship with the person—you never met them, maybe just traded some emails—the entire letter might be only a few lines. I looked back at some rejection letters I sent and realized that I usually follow a pretty simple format:

1. Say thanks.

2. Deliver the news.

3. Give the main reason.

4. Offer hope.

For example:

[Their name],

Thanks for making the time to talk with me last week. While I enjoyed our conversation, I think we need someone with more hands-on project management experience for this role. I hope you find the right job for you in the near future.

[Your name]

If you can’t think of any hope to offer at the end, then don’t. “Do not say anything that will give the recipient the impression that the door is still open,” Jocelyn Glei advises in her email writing guide, Unsubscribe. “Such clarity and finality can feel cruel, but adding additional language to ‘soften the blow’ only serves to create false hope. Say your piece and sign off.” False hope is crueler than no hope. False hope just encourages the other person to waste more of their time, and yours.

Writing a Detailed Rejection Letter

But what if the person was really close to being a good fit, and you might want to work with them in the future? Or you have more of a relationship with them? In those cases, the above message is probably too cold and too vague. When rejecting people I want to encourage, I keep the format much the same but am generally much more detailed in my reason for rejecting and more explicit in encouraging the person to try again. (Dahlander and Piezunka found that providing an explanation about why an idea was being rejected bolstered the beneficial effects of rejection—e.g., motivation and idea quality.)

I also often end with a question to try to signal that I’m genuinely interested—not just making an empty, softening-the-blow promise. For example:

[Their name],

Thanks for making the time to talk with me last week. I’m sorry to say that your candidacy did not make it to the next round; we’ve had a very competitive pool for this position. At this point, our organization really needs someone with more project management experience. However, I really enjoyed our conversation and think you could be a good fit here in the right role. Please do keep in touch—and is it OK with you if I let you know about roles that open up that might be a better fit?

All the best,

[Your name]

The more specific you are about the way you reject someone, the more information you give them. A smart rejectee will use this information to come back with a stronger case the next time. I’ve actually had a few people thank me for rejection letters I wrote to them because it gave them the kind of concrete, specific feedback they needed to get better results in their future attempts. It’s a good reminder that people do value receiving criticism, even though most of us dread giving it.

Writing a Rejection Letter When You Disagree with the Decision

It’s especially tough to pass along a rejection decision that you disagree with. Maybe you fought hard for a job candidate everyone else was unimpressed by, or championed the cause of a vendor that the executive committee thought was too expensive. I know I’ve argued for articles that other editors thought weren’t ready for prime time. It’s not a good feeling.

When this happens, it’s tempting to hide behind passive voice or other people—e.g., “It has been decided that we won’t be pursuing this” or “The bigwigs have decided to go in a different direction.” Resist that temptation. It’s not any easier to get rejected in that fashion, and writing that way undercuts your authority as a decision-maker.

If you’re the one issuing a rejection, own the rejection. It’s fair to say something like, “After a lot of discussion and back-and-forth, we’ve decided X” or “It was a really hard decision, but we’ve ultimately decided Y.” But say “we,” not “they.”

A rejection letter in which you’re hiding behind a nebulous “they” inhibits your ability to give useful feedback. It also makes your organization look fractious or contentious, which undermines other people’s desire to work with you in the future.

Delivering bad news is tough, and in different companies or cultures, these examples may sound either overly harsh or too nice. You’ll need to find your own language depending on the context and the culture. That said, remember: Don’t soften the blow just for the sake of sparing pain. False kindness just gives people false hope. And there’s nothing kind about that.

Sarah Green Carmichael is a former executive editor at Harvard Business Review.