Should You Disclose an Invisible Marginalized Identity at Work?

Author: Dannie Lynn Fountain

When I was a freshman in college, I worked overnights as a shift manager at the local McDonald’s. One night, my team members in the prep line were talking about their love lives. A colleague made a comment about their friend who happened to be in a queer relationship. The response was universal: disgust. I had yet to come out to my peers and was left in the uncomfortable position of leading a group of people who found me repulsive. I was terrified. What if my girlfriend popped in for lunch? What if my classmates saw me at the register and mentioned my personal life? Despite my positional power, I felt unsafe.

In this moment, and in countless ones since, a silent part of my identity was either judged or accepted without anyone recognizing that someone in a marginalized community was present. I am a queer, multiethnic, neurodivergent, heavily tattooed, married, plus-size, first-generation-American, cisgender woman. I was raised in a lower-class household and currently am a debt-free member of the upper class. With the exception of my tattoos, gender identity, and body size, every identity listed here is invisible in my presentation.

An invisible marginalized identity is any identity that is frequently marginalized and can be invisible in our daily presentation. My biracial identity is marginalized, but because I present as a white woman, it is invisible. Similarly, my sexuality, neurodivergence, and other identities are frequently marginalized but are not immediately evident when you meet me. Finally, there are aspects of my identity that are visible and are also stigmatized by society, such as weight. For most of my professional life, for example, I’ve presented as an “overweight” person, encountering uncomfortable instances of navigating office chairs that I couldn’t fit into, silent judgments about foods I ate, and, often, listening to conversations about health and diet at the office lunch table. Now, after losing 180 pounds, I no longer present as overweight, but I’m still considered “morbidly obese” according to the medical standard of the body mass index.

When parts of your identity are marginalized and invisible to others, moving through the world can feel a bit like walking around with dynamite in your pocket. You know it’s there—the weight of it reminds you of its power—and any unsuspecting passersby could spark an explosion. It’s a frightening position to be in, especially at work. Sometimes the invisibility is accompanied by silent relief, but most times it’s lonely. While fatphobia, for instance, is still very much a part of my day-to-day life, it no longer impacts my career advancement like it used to. In other cases, split-second decisions about whether to respond to microaggressions at work take up more headspace than any other part of my job.

The questions in my mind are circling and exhausting: How much of myself do I reveal to my colleagues? What parts do I hide? What should I consider before making those choices? How can others accommodate or accept the identities they refuse to acknowledge or can’t even see? Based on my personal experience, here’s what I’ve learned.

When Should I Disclose an Invisible Marginalized Identity at Work?

First and most importantly, there is no mandate to disclose any identity, ever. There is a reason that job applications include a voluntary self-identification form. Choosing to disclose a marginalized identity may result in new or additional stressors at work, none of which are your responsibility to bear—but they do impact your ability to earn an income. There is absolutely zero shame in choosing not to disclose an invisible identity for the purpose of protecting your earning ability. Survival trumps disclosure, always.

In a climate of toxic and persistent microaggressions, however, keeping invisible marginalized identities hidden can be exhausting. Making the choice to disclose invisible identities can, in many cases, become the spark for change. Here are a few instances when disclosing a marginalized identity might be helpful:

• Preventing the marketing team from launching an offensive, or at the very least harmful, campaign or product. For example, sharing about your invisible mixed-race Latinx identity might help your team understand how a digital marketing campaign centered on “sugar skull makeup” for Halloween could be offensive and considered cultural appropriation.

• Helping internal company culture initiatives to be messaged through uplifting means. For instance, disclosing a personal story about fatphobia could dissuade the team from voting on a team name that would demonize fat people.

• Shaping the way we think about language at work. For example, talking about your personal experiences with mental health could be an inroad to explaining why replacing the words “crazy” or “insane” with more precise language might be helpful in conversations with others.

In each of these cases, the benefits of speaking up include making the workplace a healthier and more respectful place to be every day.

There is also the consideration of whether to disclose something during the hiring process versus once you’re an employee. Overt or covert discrimination can occur during and after hiring despite legal protections, and seeking recourse can often involve a lengthy process. If you’re marginalized but are not granted legal or political rights or recognition, the protections don’t exist at all. For example, being part of the LGBTQIA+ community may not be legally recognized in some countries; neurodivergence isn’t always protected under disability laws; and weight-based identities are unprotected in many U.S. states.

Disclosing during the interview process may help you gauge the employer’s reaction to your disclosure, and understand whether you’re likely to feel respected and included in your day-to-day work. After all, an interview is your chance to vet the employer and determine whether it will be a good fit for you. Ask questions that help you learn more about the company culture as well as managers’ attitudes and beliefs around diversity and inclusion. In other words, disclosing in the interview may be the best option, as it’ll help you get a truer picture of the employer’s perspective while also opening up legal recourse if you experience discrimination after your disclosure.

How Should I Disclose an Invisible Marginalized Identity?

Making the decision to disclose an identity takes thoughtful consideration and a very serious weighing of the pros and cons. The psychological safety within a team, the potential support of a manager, and the overall company culture are all important factors. If you feel comfortable being vulnerable and honest with your colleagues, the next step is to determine how to share specific details.

Often, the action of disclosing an invisible marginalized identity takes place in stages. It may start with joining a company mailing list or an employee resource group. For me, the first disclosure of my neurodivergence at work happened by joining the ADHD, autism, and disability email lists at my company. These kinds of mailing lists may provide additional context and resources for how others have disclosed their identities, or templates that can be leveraged for future disclosures. If another individual has shared about an identity that you also hold, they may have created an FAQ document to decrease the number of personal questions they had to navigate. You may be able to leverage this same document (or something similar) during your disclosure. (For more on the challenges behind sharing details about autism, ADHD, or other neuro-difference, see the sidebar, “Disclosing Neurodivergence.”)

The next stage of your disclosure may be a one-on-one conversation with your manager. Ideally, this is a conversation where you share not only the identity in question but also the impact of that identity. For instance, does your neurodivergence present alternative ways that you might prefer to receive feedback? Does your mixed-race identity make you uncomfortable on Taco Tuesdays due to the nature of team conversations or behavior? Anchoring a disclosure on how it impacts you and the team will help the manager decide what to do next.

The final stage of the initial disclosure might be choosing to share your identity with the broader team. It may happen immediately after the previous two actions, but it may also happen with a bit of a delay or when the opportunity arises in a team setting. This stage is the most variable, centering primarily on your comfort level and the context of team culture. You could start by confiding in one or two people and then slowly opening up to the rest. You might say, “Hi, I know we work together pretty frequently on X project. I wanted to share with you that I have ADHD, which causes me to struggle with Y. By sharing this with you, I’m hoping we can adjust to Z process to accommodate this.”

Disclosure of an invisible marginalized identity is not a one-time decision. As you may have heard in the stories of those in the LGBTQIA+ community, “coming out” with an invisible identity is an ongoing process and may occur again and again with changes in role, team, responsibilities, company, and more. Be aware that the decision to disclose an invisible identity may differ in each of these contexts. That is, you may disclose your identity to your immediate team but not to ancillary department teams that you also work with semi-frequently.

At the end of the day, remember that you hold the power of disclosure and you have the context to know whether disclosing something will harm your workplace safety. The decision to disclose (or not) ultimately rests with you.